a drop of water

Stuff happens.  People and communities divide over hurt, miscommunication and differences, forming mountains that separate them, limit their perspective, and pigeonhole their identities.  Human reconciliation is a trajectory where the opposing sides are traversing that mountain.  Human reconciliation is not ignoring the mountain’s existence.  That would be devaluing and insulting to the underlying issues.  Nor is reconciliation magically making the mountain disappear (only divine reconciliation has the power and resources for that).  Traversing the mountain takes energy and is costly, but it transforms the mountain’s identity and power as a separator into a common vista from which both sides can gain deeper understanding of themselves and each other.

Ideally, mountain traversing is a mutual effort from both sides; each side will have a unique understanding and ability to traverse their own side of the mountain.  Both sides have the opportunity to be a part of the process.  Both sides also have the ability to destroy the process.  Often, one side will have the honor of intentionally sustaining the cause and enabling the other side to join the effort.  This is not easy.  Sometimes one side will have traversed the mountain and reached the other side, only to find a closed gate that can only be opened from the inside.  A friend of mine, after a number of years of trial and error, is only recently beginning to rejoice in seeing his father start up the side of the mountain.  The value of traversing the mountain is realized when all who willing to climb gain a deeper understanding of themselves and each other.  What was once a symbol of hurt, miscommunication, and separation is now a common perspective to connect and grow.

In my life, I’ve ignored the mountain and I’ve prayed for the mountain to magically go away.  Maybe it is time for me to start climbing.

I’m only a chapter into “Sacred Companions” by David Benner, but I’ve already been fed a wealth of clearly articulated insight and wisdom.  Here are a few quotes that I want to share:

“The supreme gift anyone can give another is to help that person live life more aware of the presence of God.” p.17

I often associate the best gifts with the best advice or a step by step guide from my own experience on how to resolve an issue.  I associate the best gift as being very tangible and concrete, like equipping someone with the tools necessary to complete their task.  But Benner’s point reminds me that the point is not to successfully navigate life with all the guides and howto’s of those before us, but to know God.  In light of this perspective, the supreme gift I can give to anyone is to help them live a life more aware of the prescence of God.

“If you are making significant progress on the transformational journey of Christian Spirituality, you have one or more friendships that support that journey.  If you do not, you are not.  It is that simple.” p.16

A lot of times I have the misconception that I need to figure out God on my own.  There are certainly times when you need to wrestle with God, but I think that those times are always within the context of a communal relationship with God.  C.S. Lewis talks about the idea that everyone brings out a special aspect of each other.  I will bring out a unique response from my best friends that no one else can.  Likewise–all of us bring out a side of God in how he responds to each of us.  That reality of how God relates to each of us uniquely helps us to understand and see more of God through each other.

“The soul’s journey in Christian Spirituality is a journey of becoming, not simply of doing or even being.” p.27

Sometimes I liken Christian Spirituality to the Nike motto, “Just Do It.”  But maybe thats an oversimplification.  Benner seems to be getting at the depth of the journey with this statement.  Failures, successes, mistakes and discoveries are all apart of the journey of becoming more Christ-like.  We aren’t just doing what we are told, and neither are we completely and fully being who we are called to be.  Instead we are becoming, day by day, more Christ-like.

There are a handful of books that take a well traveled bible story and dive deeper, beyond the standard conclusions and understandings to open up a wealth of life giving discoveries and connections for the reader.   A Shepherds Look at Psalm 23 is one of those books.  The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller earns this tag too.

The familiar conclusion from the parable of the prodigal son is that God is a loving father who will welcome us with open arms, regardless of the mistakes we have made.  Keller digs further, encouraging us to look at the parable as a story of two lost sons.  Since the parable was originally directed at the Pharisee’s the observations of the elder brother was intended to speak to them.  Keller proposes that the elder and younger brother represent two ways of life.  The elder brother represents the lifestyle of living by the law in order to get what he wants; the younger brother represents the lifestyle of ignoring (breaking) all laws on a path of self-discovery in order to get what he wants.  Both want the father’s assets instead of the father.  They just have opposite methods of getting what they want.

A beautiful realization that Keller writes about, addresses one of the argued points over this parable.  Some scholars point out that the grace shown to the younger son did not cost anything.  However, Keller notes that there was a real cost that the elder brother had to pay, since it was out of his inheritance that the party for his younger brother’s celebration was financed.  Through the parable, Jesus is showing the deficiency of the elder brother and juxtaposing himself as the true elder brother who paid the price for us.  In the two previous parables, (lost sheep and lost coin) the person who has lost something searches for it unceasingly until it is found.  That attribute of unceasingly searching for the object lost (the younger brother) is absent from the parable of the prodigal son and allows us to realize that Jesus has that characteristic of unceasingly searching for us until we are found.

It gives us a calling to turn our “elder brotherness” that makes us feel like we’ve earned something in God’s eyes by working hard in ministry or following his rules to become the person who is willing to unceasingly search and pay whatever is needed to find and welcome the people who have rejected God.  It helps us realize that our “elder brotherness” is very often the same type of sin as the younger brother’s and that we are both in great need of the Father’s invitation into his house.

I finished Francis Chan’s book, Crazy Love (www.crazylovebook.com), encouraged and inspired.  It infused and revitalized my understanding and desire to respond to God’s love.  In the 4th chapter, Chan profiles the lukewarm Christian.  It was a healthy check to my lifestyle.   Here are a few that convicted me:

• Lukewarm people tend to choose what is popular over what is right when they are in conflict.  They desire to fit in both at church and outside of churhc; they care more about what people think of their actions (like church attendance and giving) than what God thinks of their hearts and lives.
• Lukewarm people don’t realy want to be saved from their sin; they want only to be saved from the penalty of their sin.  They don’t genuinely hate sin and aren’t truly sorry for it; they’re merely sorry because God is going to punish them.  Lukewarm people don’t really believe that his new life Jesus offeres is better than the old sinful one.
• Lukewarm people love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves.  Their love of others is typically focused on those who love them in return, like family, friends, and other people they know and connect with.  There is little love left over for those who cannot love them back, much less for those who intentionally slight them, whose kids are better athelets than theirs, or with whom conversations are awkward or uncomfortable.  Their love is highly conditional and very seletive, and generally comes with strings attached.

Later in the 8th chapter he profiles those obsessed (to have the mind excessively preoccopied with one emotion or topic) with God.  Here are a few that convicted me:

• People who are obssesed with God are known as givers, not takers.  Obessed people genuinely think that others matter as much as they do, and they are particularly aware of those who are poor around the world (James 2:14-26)
• A person who is obsessed with Jesus is more concerned with his or her character than comfort.  Obsessed people konw that true joy doesn’t depend on circumstances or environemnet; it is a gift that must be chosen and cultivated, a gift that ultimately comes from God (James 1:2-4)
• People who are obsessed with Jesus aren’t consumed with their personal safety and comfort above all else.  Obsessed people care more about God’s kingdom coming to this earth than their own lives being shielded from pain or distress.

Chan has filled this book with countless stories of people who have lived and are living lives evident of  God’s power and love.  The stories are humbling, amazing, challenging, and revitalizing.  He cautions and encourages the reader in the following quote to listen, obey and live Christ…

Oswald Chambers wrote, “Never make a principle out of your experience; let God be as original with other people as He is with you.”  To that I would add, “Be careful not to turn others’ lives into the model for your own.” Allow God to be as creative with you as He is with each of us.

p. 167 | Crazy Love | Francis Chan

Asa shared last night at small group, what a friend had told him recently:

“Be careful what you do everyday, because you will get good at it.”

Its a sobering and freeing thought…that the attitudes, lifestyles, and decisions that make up our daily lives inherently reinforce themselves to where they become easier, more routine, and more natural.  It’s sobering because if I choose to come home from work and watch a few hours of TV to relax and be entertained, I’ll get good at…watching TV.  If I spend all my free time on websites like fatwallet looking for opportunities for arbitrage, I’ll get good at making money the goal of my life.  If I am I quick to speak and quick to anger, then I’ll get good at judging people around me.  Getting good at something is almost always at the expense of not getting good at something else.  So I have to ask myself, what does getting good at A cost me in terms of getting good at B?

If I’m good at watching TV, I probably won’t very practiced at having lucid and thoughtful conversations about my day with friends and family.  If I’m good at making money the main goal of my time, then I won’t be very good at seeing the value in relationships and the priceless intangibles of life.  If I’m good at judging people around me, then I’ll be horrible at being open to God’s love and direction for myself and those around me.  If I’m good at waking up and immediately checking and responding to email, I’ll be very weak at depending on God for a right start in the day.  If I’m good at complaining about work, then I probably will be blind to the joys that God has for me in the present.

But the truth in this statement is also freeing.  If we practice daily the attitudes and lifestyles that we want to become second nature, then it will happen.  We will get good at the things we do daily.  If I practice going to work joyfully and giving 100%, then it will get easier to do day by day.  If I practice being patient, loving, and always having a sensitive ear to those around me, I’ll get good at it.  If I practice waking up in the morning and spending time with God by reading in the Bible and praying, it I will gradually come to expect and depend on it.  I guess this is the heart of the spiritual disciplines, and ultimately the Christian faith, daily engaging, learning from, and loving God.