a drop of water

Dallas Willard, The Great Omission

The people to whom we minister and speak will not recall 99% of what we say to them, but they will never forget the kind of persons we are. This is certainly true of influential ministers of my own past. The quality of our souls will indelibly touch others for good or for ill. So we must never forget that the most important thing happening at any moment amongst all our ministerial duties is the kind of persons we are becoming.

I’m only a chapter into “Sacred Companions” by David Benner, but I’ve already been fed a wealth of clearly articulated insight and wisdom.  Here are a few quotes that I want to share:

“The supreme gift anyone can give another is to help that person live life more aware of the presence of God.” p.17

I often associate the best gifts with the best advice or a step by step guide from my own experience on how to resolve an issue.  I associate the best gift as being very tangible and concrete, like equipping someone with the tools necessary to complete their task.  But Benner’s point reminds me that the point is not to successfully navigate life with all the guides and howto’s of those before us, but to know God.  In light of this perspective, the supreme gift I can give to anyone is to help them live a life more aware of the prescence of God.

“If you are making significant progress on the transformational journey of Christian Spirituality, you have one or more friendships that support that journey.  If you do not, you are not.  It is that simple.” p.16

A lot of times I have the misconception that I need to figure out God on my own.  There are certainly times when you need to wrestle with God, but I think that those times are always within the context of a communal relationship with God.  C.S. Lewis talks about the idea that everyone brings out a special aspect of each other.  I will bring out a unique response from my best friends that no one else can.  Likewise–all of us bring out a side of God in how he responds to each of us.  That reality of how God relates to each of us uniquely helps us to understand and see more of God through each other.

“The soul’s journey in Christian Spirituality is a journey of becoming, not simply of doing or even being.” p.27

Sometimes I liken Christian Spirituality to the Nike motto, “Just Do It.”  But maybe thats an oversimplification.  Benner seems to be getting at the depth of the journey with this statement.  Failures, successes, mistakes and discoveries are all apart of the journey of becoming more Christ-like.  We aren’t just doing what we are told, and neither are we completely and fully being who we are called to be.  Instead we are becoming, day by day, more Christ-like.

A few highlights (there were many) over the last few weeks:

1. Dean and Pauline were wed.  During the bachelor’s party, Dean was given a mario mustache and a red indian dot with red lipstick from the dollar store, but the highlight was when the guys starting sharing their wishes for Dean.  Dave gave a quote, “Do as the Amish do — love God, love family and work hard”.  That idea, in its simplicity, is so refreshing.  And so, I wish you to also, do as the Amish do.

2. During the wedding ceremony (Thomas Fogarty Winery), the pastor gave a message about how marriage is not about someone getting their own needs met, but about service and sacrifice.  I feel like dating and marriage often gets reduced to finding the right one for me, the one who meets my list of conditions, the one who meets my needs, the one who will match perfectly with the way I want to live my life.  But marriage is so much more than that.

3. Jenn and I celebrated our 1st year anniversary in Downtown San Francisco (Hotel Palomar).  Aside from me not wanting to ask people for directions (and making a few wrong turns), and me forgetting our umbrella and having to buy some on the street during the downpour, we had a great time.  Lots of walking and talking and exploring, just the two of us.  We tried some new foods (Malaysian, Swedish) and talked about plans for next year.  I love my wife :)

4. Spent Christmas evening listening to my cousin Eric, recent graduate from West Point, present what was termed, the discipleship pipeline.  To me, this diagram is helpful in self-assessing where one stands in their calling to discipleship. It provides some concrete guidelines on what we have been doing, what we are doing now, and what we should be doing towards the ultimate goal of being disciples of Christ.  I want to devote a whole post to the diagram, so I won’t say more here.

My rss reader (newsgator) was filled with posts from all of the blogs that I try and follow.  Lots of quality posts, a few of which I want to link here because they are well worth your time:

• Tell it Slant – A Recessionary Offer – James Choung
• The Suburban Christian Blog  - Al Hsu

Jamie mentioned in his sermon a few weeks ago at Coast, that we are hungry for God’s direction, for the power of the Spirit and for his answers to our questions and problems, but we are not hungry for our character to be made more like God’s character and not for the fruit of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, patient, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

It was a sharp reminder to me.  I want the answers, and the power to work in people’s lives and pass over the working through the hard stuff of love, joy, peace, patient, kindess, goodenss, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control in my personal relationships with God and people.

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Jamie also posed the question, “What are we known for?”  It’s an interesting question to answer yourself and ask a close friend.  I think that the point of the question is not to ‘just’ find out what people think of you, but to realize that what your are known for is a direct result of how much you are letting God into your life.  His work in you and through will (or lack of) will overflow out in your actions and people will know you for that.  Examining what you are known for is one window into how God is working your life.

Maybe a different way to pose this question is, “What are you sowing in your life?”  In light of Andy Crouch’s call to be cultivators and creators, I think we need to be sowing.  Then we have to ask the equally important question of where we are getting seeds to sow?

These questions are an attempt to create spaces where we can invite and allow God to speak into and guide our lives.  They are meant to lead to challenges to are methods of thinking, our habits, and our perspectives and let God redeem us from the inside out.  This is not intended to be a list to check off, in a “did-this, did-that” pragmatic approach, but instead to allow God’s guidance and leading to shape our decisions and the foundations they come out of.  You may discover that the issues and obstalces you are trying to face are in a completely different direction than the direction God wants you to head.

Questions…

1. Where and when do I feel most close to and most distant from God and where is God leading me through those times?

2.  What am I consciously dependent on God for in my life?  (aka, what in my life would change if God was not around?)  What can I be more intentionally dependent on God for in my life? (What areas in my life must I release my control of and my anxiety of into God’s hands?)

3. Where and how much am I giving and where and how much am I getting in my life. (Suggested categories: time / rest, hopes / dreams, relationships, sexuality, finances, social issues, knowledge, wisdom, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control).  How does does my heart match up with God’s on these areas?

The start of answers…

1. For me, understanding where I feel least close to God speaks louder to me than understanding where I feel most close to God.  This is because I’m realizing that when I feel distant from God it is my own fault.  I’ve either left him behind and run in the other direction, or have turned my back to him and have forgotten to acknowlege his presence in what I am doing at the moment.

2. Honestly and soberingly, I feel like a failure in answering this question, which is why I must ask it of myself more frequently.  Very little of my life is consciously or intentionally dependent on God.  I know that I like having control over as much as I can manage, and often try to control too many things, resulting in anxieties that make me forget God even more.

3. The suggested categories in is only the tip of the iceberg for this question.  A lot of times I wonder why someting I’ve worked on just doesn’t come out right and it’s usually because the pieces that made up the whole weren’t right.  I need to understand the simple relationship that what I put in my heart, mind and soul determines what comes out.